TWENTY FIVE THINGS I LEARNED FROM MY MOTHER

She taught me the following:

GOOD HOUSEKEEPING
'If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.'

PIETY
'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.'

TIME TRAVEL
'If you don't behave, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!'

THE RULE OF REASON
'Because I said so, that's why.'

LOGIC
'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck,you're not going to the store with me.'

FORESIGHT
'Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.'

COUNSELING
'Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about.'

MAGIC TRICKS
'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.'

CONTORTIONISM
'Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!'

ENDURANCE
'You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.'

METEOROLOGY
'This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.'

HYPOCRISY
'If I told you once, I've told you a million times… Don't exaggerate!'

BASIC REALITIES
'I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.'

PSYCHOLOGY
'Stop acting like your father!'

ENVY
'There are millions of children in this world who don't have parents like you do.'

ANTICIPATION
'Just wait until we get home.'

THE GREAT OUTDOORS
'You are going to get it when you get home!'

OPHTHAMOLOGY
'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.'

EMPATHY
'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?'

BASIC PODIATRY
'When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me.'

HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT
'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.'

GENETICS
'You're just like your father.'

FAMILY ROOTS
'Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?'

UNDERSTANDING
'When you get to be my age, you'll know what I mean.'

And my favorite: JUSTICE
'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!
RELIGION
'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.'

MAGIC TRICKS
'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.'
FAMILY ROOTS
'Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?'

IDENTIFICATION WITH OTHERS
'There are millions of children in this world who don't have parents like you do.'

GENETICS
'You're just like your father.'

BASIC REALITIES
'I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.'
TIME TRAVEL
'If you don't behave, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!'

And my favorite: JUSTICE
'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!

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Frank Gerace Ph.D also offers resources for Spanish Speaking learners of English at www.InglesParaLatinos.com and for English speaking learners of Spanish at . He also maintains a blog at www.InglesParaHispanos.blogspot.com . He has served in Latin America in United Nations and national Educational and Communication Projects, and has taught in Bolivian and Peruvian Universities. He currently teaches English in New York City at a CUNY college as well as maintaining a strong bilingual presence on the web. He provides guidance on accent reduction and the proper American English accent at www.GoodAccent.com.">www.InglesParaLatinos.com/SpanishCourses.htm . He also maintains a blog at www.InglesParaHispanos.blogspot.com . He has served in Latin America in United Nations and national Educational and Communication Projects, and has taught in Bolivian and Peruvian Universities. He currently teaches English in New York City at a CUNY college as well as maintaining a strong bilingual presence on the web. He provides guidance on accent reduction and the proper American English accent at www.GoodAccent.com.

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