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Dr. Kevin Leman On Marriage And Sex Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known psychologist who has penned twenty-five novels on marriage, intimacy, raising children, and how to keep sex in a marriage healthy. He is a follower of the teachings of Alfred Adler, a contemporary of Sigmund Freud and the innovative thinker who used birth-order to help determine where people would go with their lives. Using these concepts, Leman has been able to help couples all over the world. Leman is also the founder of an online Christian dating service and he has interviewed many Christian couples while researching his self-help books. He is a firm believer that talking to children about sex and making them understand what it is all about, why they should wait, and what the consequences are is better than letting the schools simply handling the task. The information coming from their parents means more to the children because it shows them that their parents are interested in their lives and less damage will be caused to everyone because the truth is being told to these kids. Of course Dr. Leman also tells people that while talking about sex with their kids they need to cover topics that were once taboo, such as oral sex. With the many different sexual scandals that are all over the news today, children in elementary school have knowledge of what it is, and some middle school students are engaging in it. They don’t yet understand that this is all part of the sexual encounter and parents have to cover this and not hide it. He feels that sex in a marriage is a strong and pure thing and being sexy towards your spouse helps build a tighter bond. Doing things for each other is a critical factor of both a healthy sex life and strong marriage. They can be little things like asking if they need something while at the store, or pampering one another by arranging a weekend getaway for your spouse so they can have some time alone. It is things like this he advises his couples to do to strengthen what they have and he warns them to stay away from pornography. By getting couples to sit down and express their feelings to each other, be it in verbal or written form, Leman has shown them that sex really is a part of their life and they must be comfortable with one another and share in it or else they will not last. The hardest part of this is a couple who are different accepting each other for who they are and working at it. Communication is something that is lacking between spouses and he tells newlyweds who come to him for help that they must talk and move on their journey through life together. Once last thing he advises is that men and women both need to remember that the man in the relationship wants to be his beloved’s hero. He wants to be the one she turned to for saving when the chips are down. By remembering that, the relationship can only grow.
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Garret Bolthouse is the author of this article on Kevin Leman. Find more information about Dr. Kevin Leman's Parenting and Marriage Seminars here.
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